Poem for a Loved One

For my sister.


The Runaway’s Creed

I dare not decide which way I’m to go,
Only let the winds take me where they may.
I fear the clear skies, the calm waters, the road
Comforted only by storms, winding ways, unexpected,
My indecision lends itself well to this world
My fear cradled in its shaking arms,
No tattoos,
Only hidden wounds.
Blind to the constants that would make idle my bones
And stifle my moans,
Blind to the love that would suffocate well
And keep me from hell,
I dare not swim safely to shore.
They would make dust of me,
Trample me laughing
Those I used to run with and lie with and love
A love unassuming,
Disloyal,
Intense.
If I were to halt in front of this mirror
Examine my lines and my scars
I would know me
Before I was done,
Before I had come into Crazy
And let myself out
And been rescued.
If I were to land
I’d feel earth ‘neath my feet
Know where I stood,
And be blamed for my stumbling.
If I continue to drown, I stay primal
My animal
Bound by no law and no man.
One day I’ll return and tell tales,
You’ll tear at what you believe
Are my wrappings,
Try to restore me
But I have been stripped
This is all that I am.