I don't usually express publicly what I'm thankful for. Why? Because honestly, I have so much I can list, it feels like bragging. But after feeling a little down in the dumps last night for no particular reason, and then waking up this morning and realizing how silly it was, I finally decided to write it all down somewhere I would never forget. I couldn't possibly name everything, but be warned: this is not a list of things I'm thankful for this week. This one spans my entire life.
or, the people
I am thankful for my parents, who have worked their entire lives to secure a comfortable future for our family filled with opportunity.
For the same reasons, I give thanks for my grandparents, all four of whom have beaten incredible odds to get us all to where we are today. Aka, existing. I often think about how many couples and families have had to work and fall in love throughout history for me, a unique specimen, to be born (It's 2^[time since the dawn of humankind]).
I am grateful that I am attending an amazing university, and for finding majors that I am passionate about.
I am [again] thankful for my parents for paying for me to attend this university.
I am thankful to the university for somehow matching up my freshman roommate--E--and I, who I am thankful to have as am amazing friend and housemate (how often does it happen that your freshman roommate becomes your best friend?).
I am thankful for my boyfriend, T, who has stuck by me through thick and thin for what will be 2.5 years this month. I'm thankful for our comfortable silences, our inside jokes, and our loyalty to each other.
I am grateful for being healthy, safe, and happy, and I am grateful to myself for getting myself there, for fighting for it, no matter what roadblocks my wacky brain put in the way.
The Littler Things.
or, the more material
I am grateful for my surroundings: an apartment, a beautiful, open-minded city filled with and encircled by nature, and a progressive state.
I am grateful for the ocean.
I am grateful for the magic of computers and the hard truth of economics (doesn't quite fit with the rest, but it's true).
I am grateful for J.R.R. Tolkien and the spell he puts me under every night when I read his words.
I am grateful for having a big fluffy bed.
I am grateful for coffee, and our new coffee maker; we were perfectly fine with using our old broken one (we rebuilt it every morning to make our precious drink), but apparently E's parents found it hilarious and got us a real Mr. Coffee (with a delay timer and everything!!).
I am grateful for the giant fern outside my window.
I am grateful for fairytales.
I am grateful for having found this little blogosphere, and for getting to catch a glimpse into the lives of such amazing, independent, resourceful, caring, adventurous, forward-thinking women.
The lists do not end here, only my train of thought.
Growing up in my parents' home, we made a point of having family meals together. No one ate until we had all sat down around the table and one of us girls had said a prayer. It was a little redundant, being spoken usually by the current 9 or 10 year old, and went something like this: Thank you God for all our food, and give food to the ones who don't have food. Then we would add things we needed a little cosmic help with, like wishing a family member would recover from being sick.
I don't say thank you to God anymore. While I have no issue with religion (unless it's imposed upon others and/or causes harm), I have long since ceased to believe in the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit (although apparently I still capitalize their names). I have two kinds of thank yous now: those I address to people, and those that are open-ended. Because really, you don't have to be thankful to any one person or thing. You can just, very simply, give thanks.
You may choose to give a name to that infinite place you send your gratitude to. Many have: many call it God. It makes sense that, throughout history, whenever humans have been the recipients of good fortune, they felt there was a higher power they needed to direct their thanks to, for fear that lack of acknowledgement would surely cause that higher power to withhold future joys.
I'm not here to contest that, although there are plenty of ways I could (e.g., if your parents are paying for your college education, don't thank God; thank your parents!).
All I'm saying is that I am thankful, although I don't know how I got lucky enough to have all these things to be thankful for.
Maybe it's karma. Not the misinterpreted give-and-take within our single lives, but the original Buddhist principle within Samsara (the cycle of birth and rebirth); maybe in a past life I did something right.
Who knows.
In conclusion:
an open ended Thank you.
xoxo
Maralah
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